[A New Year's piece I wrote above ground.]
1 JAN 2023 00:00 I didn't make any New Year's Resolutions last year. I refused to. Well, I thought be it a river, a storm, or a twirling lake, I'll see where it takes me and I'll find the resolutions as I go. It's now the New Year…… technically it is/is not, because I'm multiple kilometres above sea and between time. I took a junky selfie to commemorate. I'm assuming most of us feel that nibbling guilt on our ribs every once this time comes around. That echo through the halls that, Well, This is It, You've got to make Something of yourself. It's Time. Again. Now's the time, and you've got to do it. And Last Year was…… Good hours spent with good friends I grew up with. I've gratefully learnt from them the inevitability of change. Things change, people will drift apart, friends who used to come over for sleepovers became schoolmates who wave from outside class. These friends I call melancholy, sorrow, grief, resentment, regret, guilt, and anxiety. I learn to appreciate the moments we reconnect. Sticking a magnifying glass down my guts and allowing it to be a part of me. Like a blooming flower of mirrors, I feel curious, so endlessly curious. I want to learn who I am. I want to grow as I grow. I find reassurance in that I'll know, my own concoction of to-stay-or-to-go, that going in circles or ovals or indistinct scribbles will be finding a path of my own. Most of all, learning to love to love. Mostly, trying to live. I don't know if I can make Something of myself, or if I can even grasp what Something is. But I'm beginning to hope that I can be a changing scenery. That's all. Happy 2023. :)


Song recommendations: 1. The Fear of Losing This - Florist 2. Because Dreaming Costs Money, My Dear - Mitski 3. Paul - Big Thief
Image sources (left - right): 1) https://www.pinterest.com/pin/610378555783307174/ 2) https://www.pinterest.com/pin/610378555783261715/